If Only

i wish i could do those things, i think about what if my family was all together and healthy almost everyday, and i do worry about all the people i lose in my life.. alot of what people don’t understand about jhd is how much it takes you away, i used to be compassionate and love hugs and now im the complete opposite they physically hurt because of my sensory disorder, and i can’t see around my mind for the completely compassionate part anymore either, thoughts even aren’t mine anymore i ignore them. One of the most confusing things in jhd is the thought of ages, they freeze at a certain age, you can say age of onset or diagnosis or anything but it doesnt change that even though your growing and can do more stuff doesnt mean your mind is the same way, i’m more of a child then an adult. Mom says shes raising two teenagers because me and erica are both sick and stuck at ages. You might not understand it but i prefer shirley temple and cartoon movies and childrens books more then things i cant understand as easily. You can think of us at any age we are but you can’t see inside of us. That says it for the whole jhd population.