Dying

I’ve been prepared for it for awhile now while i was able to do the certain things I’ve had to do. FYI it’s only pajamas at my service.. I had it pinned but it’s like when I was diagnosed ready but I felt nothing like ready

Everyone dies I’ve seen so much faith truly real I’m not scared because even when Daddy was dying he seen Karli. I know God and Jesus are through life and death. 

My symptoms are becoming very terrible and i could die at anytime. Right nowthese muscle spasms making me inhale makes my first fear pneumonia.. But it could still be anything before then.. Amazing friends amazing family amazing community.. I get through it.. I can admit I’m still scared but at least I made it to Gods time and it wasn’t alone 

I know I need this and want it to finally be over but and one of the hardest parts to get people to accept is when you have to look death straight in front of you. It’s still scary it hurts i wonder if i did everything if everyone knows how much I love and appreciate everything absolutely everything and my puppies know how much I love them even when they can’t see me the same way anymore 

I don’t have a clue how long this damn disease is going to give me and we don’t like to think of it but there’s no escaping I’ll finally be free and the symptoms that are so scary and getting worse.. I need to figure out how to get through what I have left because if it’s short I have things to do no matter how limited I’ve become, first step is to figure out how to stop crying and take it in

I do know I’d do it all over again if I got to be part of my family and the people I’ve met and love. As you can tell even by this website I’ve lived an amazing life with so much love in it

Love,

-Jacey-