Progressing

It seems like i’ve progressed a level, i dont ever know when my body mainly left side will stay contracted the seizures that make me thrash and fall and stiffen have gotten bad and longer and more often im on number 16 i think in a week and 2ish days, i’ve learned to type right handed, i wake up too early and fall asleep between 4-7am and most the time need the help of benadryl but no matter when i wake up i still have seizures and more often stuck in my body and was having real actual seizures, choking more often, reflux, dizzy, unable to handle situations bc of fatigue, the muscle spasms that make me breathe in instead of out, everything is just getting worse and i dont even know what im going to die from, i could choke i could get aspirations i cant take antibiotics it could be a seizure etc im not getting a feeding tube so i could starve long shot on that one but i’ve been losing weight fast 7 pounds in a month and its been hard to eat because i’ve been so sick all the time my stomach just seems to be so insane as does my throat with what i eat i dont know how long it’ll take im so overdue but the good news is lilli said once im grown up like she is the doctor will let me eat popcorn again!! she even gestured with the hands started low and then higher and higher and higher so is soo cute